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No. 0     Original Topic:  Now engaged!   
By:  doug_indianapolis   Gender: M   Age: 37   on  Sep 27, 2007 at 2:52 AM   Viewed 82482 times     

1-2009 update of Success story...

How I became engaged with my MeetChristians sweetheart...

Now engaged! I met my (now) fiancee originally through MeetChristians. See my profile for more!

1-2009 update entry:

The Matt. 6:33 Christian courtship/engagement & MC success story following is about being ENGAGED (with a marriage GOAL for the near future). Be encouraged & read on!

My fiancee & I formed a wedding goal (after our recent engagement, to later/eventually) be married (ASAP hopefully). Our first aim was for sometime in 2008, but the timeframe eventually delayed some (due to numerous factors) & is now 2009 (so we are still, as of 1/2009, engaged, fully planning to have our wedding (though a little later) - sometime in 2009.

See more here...

10-2008 MeetChristians entry:

I want to encourage those of you who read my profile to be wisely cautious in a Christian way about "male/female friendship." Song of Songs says: "Do NOT arouse or awaken love (marriage interest) until it (God's will & confirmation & timing) so desires."

I personally stayed AWAY from marriage (& other female relationship) possibilities (including no dating at all) for most of 20 years before I met the Christian woman who has now become my fiancee. I did all this waiting & intentional abstinence as a Christian. For Christian reasons. This made it easier for me to steadfastly remain a virgin. And keep my heart focused on LOVE CLOSENESS with JESUS first & most!!! All those years. To grow in God's Word. And learn a lifestyle of MINISTRY to others. Jesus, my FIRST LOVE 4ever! I encourage you to do the same.

Repent & turn away from UNbelievers (if you ever get tempted to any interest with an opposite-sex NON-Christian). The Bible says: "do not be yoked together with UNbelievers!" 2 Cor. 6 Run far from it! Such a person is danger & DEATH!

Since we ONLY MARRY ONCE (rightly), it is best to wait on the right time, God's will & the right person. A true, dedicated Christian who wants to serve the Lord EXACTLY like we do. Then love, romance & marriage happen ONCE ONLY & LAST for a LIFETIME! That's marriage. Hallelujah!

My fiancee is a wonderful Christian woman. Who has lived most of ten years as a DEDICATED missionary to reach young people for Christ on college campuses & everywhere! I love my Christian companion SO MUCH! She is the BEST for me.

I earlier "kissed dating goodbye" for about 20 years. I met the woman who would become my wife in 2003. Those 20+ years previous to that were FOR JESUS & His glory! Seek FIRST the kingdom of God! Matt. 6:33 "Alone," but BLESSED in JESUS! The single years focused on Jesus, prayer, God's Word & ministry (with no dating or romantic pursuits) were some of the VERY BEST years of my life! I have no regrets.

My newly confirmed fiancee & I first built a caring, Christian friendship. A Christ-centered one. Learning how to serve & give & minister to each other. In simple, pure ways. Blend our hearts together in a life of spiritual seeking. And ministry to others. Our very first "dates" were synchronized "hours of prayer!"

We built a Matt. 6:33 Christian friendship, prayed together, sought God together, read the Bible & studied God's Word together for 4 years. Loved together, laughed & cried together! Held JESUS as our CENTRAL GOAL.

All this remaining virgins, with God first in our goals. Committed still to no physical romantic touching & no physical first kiss (still none yet). (Our first kiss will be the DAY of our WEDDING! Hallelujah!!!)

All this, seeking God first, we did for 4 years before FIXING a specific MARRIAGE GOAL with a timeframe. We made sure our relationship was God's will & on the foundation of Christ (1 Cor. 3) before proceeding.

Please pray for my Christian fiancee & I for our newly formed "MARRIAGE GOAL 2009."

The best is yet to come!

Jeremiah 29:11-14
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.
13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
14 I will be found by you," declares the LORD.

In Jesus,
- doug_indianapolis

Some Biblical background (in addition)...

God's Word on Marriage:
the one for life

The Biblical term, husband, refers to a male. Wife, refers to a female. Each male marrying a female is Jesus' definition of marriage.
Mark 10:2-16 Jesus replied..."At the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.' 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

One lifelong marriage (permanence). Between one male & one female (a heterosexual couple or relationship is the only permissible approach, by God's design). Lifelong faithfulness, one man with one woman, this is God's definition of marriage.

One lifelong marriage, lifelong faithfulness, is God's will and made clear by these words...
1Tim. 3:2 Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach...

1Tim. 3:12 A deacon must be the husband of but one wife and must manage his children and his household well.

Titus 1:6 An elder must be blameless, the husband of but one wife,a man whose children believe and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient.

1Cor. 7:10-11 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

Notice God's Word consistently says: one husband, one wife, for life. Despite the numerous failures around us, in God there is a different way called for. And no truly legitimate exceptions. No separation. No divorce. Ever. Remarriage never becomes an issue. Because you do things God's way the first time. Any looking for loopholes or joining the unfaithfulness of our generation is somewhere you never want to go. Unfaithfulness or multiple marriages is never recommended or encouraged anywhere in scripture (except in the case of unavoidable widowhood). God's character and heart is faithfulness. Patient, persevering love. Lifelong trueness of heart. Faithful, steadfastness. Purity of life. One husband. One wife. Everlasting covenant.

Romans 7:2-3 By law a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. So then, if she marries another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress, even though she marries another man.

1Cor. 7:39 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.

1Tim. 5:9 No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband...

Notice God describes here the kind of woman He considers blessed and commendable. One who has lived His appropriate way: in unbroken, lifelong faithfulness to ONE husband. And this, God's expressed desire for each marriage. Scripture constantly defines the male/female relationship of marriage as lifelong. The faithful way God says marriage needs to be done, lifelong with ONE.

Mark 10:2-16 Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" "What did Moses command you?" he replied. They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away." "It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law," Jesus replied. "But at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.' 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."

Notice Jesus here 'raised the bar' and said that, in God, divorce is no longer an option. And whenever it was permitted in the history of man's choices it is revealed as only an act of sinful hardheartedness. And such sin, Jesus says, is not what God wants in the lives of His children. Hardhearted separation & divorce misses God's will (in many ways). And is clearly against His Word. What Love calls for in each marriage & each home is unity, lifelong faithfulness & love between man and wife.

2Cor. 11:2 "I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him."

Notice, even with the love of Heaven, God calls us to one Husband, heart faithfulness to One Love. And no other gods!

Male/female relationships (or possible ones) are often a major point of confused feelings and decisions in most people's lives. Then to become a Christian and try to let God be Lord of this most unruly area of human emotion becomes a new, big challenge. To live life God's way and limit our number of marriage "relationships" (as God wants) to ONLY ONE for life, well, that's a BIGGER challenge. Yet God's expressed will and His only best.

For each Christian, there is meant to be only ONE husband (or wife) for each of us (forever) for the rest of our life.

The above message was written & put together by brother Jeff. Most scripture quotes are from the NIV Bible.

Please feel free to print out and make copies of messages to share freely with others.
Pass it on! Matthew 10:8

See more of this here...
No. 1     Reply: Re: Now engaged!   
By:  Gary208   Gender: M   Age: 58   on  Sep 28, 2007 at 3:20 PM     
Congrats Doug!

No. 2     Reply: Christlike ways to become (MeetChristians) engaged...   
By:  doug_indianapolis   Gender: M   Age: 39   on  Mar 27, 2010 at 11:37 AM     
One of the scriptures (the principle of waiting, abstinence & holiness- then faithfulness to ONE spouse for the rest of your/our lifetime) which God is very strict about is this:

"Among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity...because these are improper for God's holy people...For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person--such a man is an idolater--has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God."

Ephesians 5:3-5

Even if a person has a stumbling or past failure, or they find they are not able to do everything perfectly, there are still Christian standards & Christlike ways which ALL are to pursue. Real love in a courting or engaged couple allows room for holiness & TRUE LOVE WAITS. God is more honored by patience, holiness & waiting than by premature indulgence or foolish pursuit of multiple partners or multiple marriage suitors (or sloppy dating which goes too far with numerous temporary people).

Each Christian should ask themselves questions like these: How far is too far? How many emotional involvements are blessed & when is it too many? How many marriage possibilities does God REALLY want me to pursue? How sacred is marriage? To me?

Then answer those questions with the help of the Holy Spirit & the Word of God OPEN before you.

No. 3     Reply: NOW MARRIED: the FULL LOVE STORY succeeded! Re: Now engaged!   
By:  doug_indianapolis   Gender: M   Age: 39   on  Mar 27, 2010 at 11:59 AM     
NOW MARRIED: the FULL LOVE STORY finally succeeded! (Christian friends, courtship, engagement, then a wedding. Now we are married FOREVER!)

Years of patient waiting & seeking God. Through many dangers, toils & snares we have already journeyed. Twas grace that brought us safe thus far, and GRACE will lead me home!

Please see my personal profile (by clicking on my picture or my user name link) & enjoy the encouragement blessing & grace of our Christian (Christ-centered) LOVE STORY. Just look at the added comments section (at the bottom of my profile) to see our full ENGAGEMENT & MARRIAGE story. WOW! The faithfulness of GOD's GRACE! AMAZING!!!

We met on Meet Christians in 2003. Sought God about His will during 2003-2005 & enjoyed a Christ-focused friendship. This became a deeper Christian courtship (from 2004-2007). Became formally engaged in 2008. GOT MARRIED in 2009! Now we are HAPPILY MARRIED for a LIFETIME! In Christ. Our whole approach to courtship & romance is simply this: SEEK GOD FIRST Matt. 6:33 Once we find "the ONE," stay TRUE to that ONE, then PURSUE marriage, by God's permission & confirming grace. Wait on the right time. Stay virgins until you get married. THEN walk out the commitment of grace & love. The Lord gave me these principles to guide my future marriage: "I still love you no matter how many times you hurt me." Jer. 31:3, Hosea chapters 1 & 2. On the day of our wedding, my bride & I proposed our wedding theme to be the motto of our marriage: "Love is a COMMITMENT that lasts for a lifetime." After years of faithful & patient waiting, we GOT MARRIED gloriously & amazingly, by God's grace, in 12/2009. About two months after our wedding, the Lord spoke to my heart quietly & very clearly one day saying: "Keep your commitment NO MATTER WHAT." (There are times like this when you know GOD is REALLY TALKING to YOU.) I believe (& have experienced that GOD is the Author & Designer of marriage. If we humble ourselves & seek Him, the Lord can make "everything beautiful in His time."

Please see my personal profile (by clicking on my picture or my user name link) & enjoy the encouragement blessing & grace of our Christian (Christ-centered) LOVE STORY. Just look at the added comments section (at the bottom of my profile) to see our full ENGAGEMENT & MARRIAGE story. WOW! The faithfulness of GOD's GRACE! AMAZING!!!

No. 4     Reply: The MeetChristians journey 2000-2010: NOW MARRIED! Re: Now engaged!   
By:  doug_indianapolis   Gender: M   Age: 39   on  Mar 27, 2010 at 12:17 PM     

I first put my profile here on this nice MeetChristians website back in 2000. (Not really planning to meet or marry someone.) I mainly thought I would "see what is going on" & send edifying Christian messages, Bible verss & Biblical studies in writing to fellow Christians. But back in those years, I began praying & seriously seeking God about a lifetime partner (secretly). I was one of those LONGTIME Christians who also remained LONGTIME single.

I met the sweet girl who (later) became my Christian bride here through MeetChristians in 2003. We had a five year courtship based on Matthew 6:33. Then became FORMALLY engaged in 2008. We GLORIOUSLY got MARRIED in 2009! It's a LONG STORY. To the glory of God! BOTH of us married still virgins. Our wedding was a CLEAR & convincing testimony of the REAL LOVE of GOD manifest between a man & his bride. Everyone was VERY TOUCHED by God's PRESENCE the whole day of our wedding. Ever since, our TOGETHERNESS has been a real testimony to the FAITHFULNESS of God & an experience of His goodness & love. Sometimes we have trials, troubles, hardships or conflicts, but God's grace is ALWAYS SUFFICIENT. And the Word of God (the Holy Bible) is the BEST MARRIAGE MANUAL ever given to man! We, together, experienced the AMAZING SOVEREIGNTY of the Lord's unfolding plan. It happened because we both GOT DOWN ON OUR KNEES. And stayed there for 5 patient waiting years. The HOLY SPIRIT is the One who rightly brings two people together. Then, in the fullness of HIS time, JOINS THEM for His purpose & glory. Now we embark on our mission, the beginning of a lifelong fulfillment in marriage, to love one another, fulfill the Great Commission & experience the true love of Jesus (our Song of songs). Wow! Dreams really do come true. God is GOOD. And TRUE LOVE STORIES never have an ending.

No. 5     Reply: NOW MARRIED: the FULL LOVE STORY succeeded!   
By:  doug_indianapolis   Gender: M   Age: 39   on  Jun 3, 2010 at 12:40 AM     

For more on this. And to enjoy more of the REST of this story, please see the other post (nearby here in the success stories forum). And the FULL DETAILS in my profile. Post to look for nearby here is titled: NOW MARRIED: the FULL LOVE STORY succeeded! (First, Christian friends, then courtship, then engagement, NOW MARRIED!)
No. 6     Reply: Marriage1forLife   
By:  doug_indianapolis   Gender: M   Age: 39   on  Jul 24, 2010 at 10:07 PM     
Here is an edifying link to helpful truths from God's Word about marriage: